Three Skills of Super Communicators

My yoga teacher recently did a beautiful, generous gesture for one of her students, Oliver, who was feeling anxious about launching his new album.

She sensed his nervousness, so she opened her home to him for a small, intimate concert for our yoga class.

His lyrics were breathtaking. Raw. Personal.

In that one-hour concert, I learnt more about Oliver than I had in the few years we’d been practising yoga together.

I left feeling more connected to him because he made it easy for us to understand his story.

In a sea of AI slop, authentic, meaningful communication has never been more important.

Here are three tips for being a Super Communicator, based on what I’ve observed and learned over more than 25 years of helping leaders communicate with clarity, confidence and impact.

 

 Listen

When we’re new to leadership, there’s often a temptation to prove ourselves by jumping in to fix things when someone comes to us with a problem.

This is one of the great paradoxes of leadership: people are often promoted because they’re technically excellent, but what makes them successful as a leader is no longer their technical expertise. It’s their ability to lead and develop others.

Leadership isn’t about having all the answers. Sometimes it’s about slowing down, asking a few questions and letting others work things out for themselves.

Try asking:

“What’s working?”

“What’s getting in the way?”

“What have you tried so far?”

And before jumping in with your own view, try saying:

“So, what I’m hearing is…”

Reflecting back what you’ve heard helps check that you’ve understood the situation and gives the other person a chance to clarify or correct you.

Listening is a critical skill for Super Communicators because it builds trust and helps you understand what people really need.

 

Clarify

One of the hardest things about being a first-time leader is that you’re often in the middle.

There’s information coming at you from above – new strategies, priorities, new ways of working –  and then your team looks at you and asks:

“Okay… but what does this actually mean for us?”

Your job isn’t just to pass the information on. It’s to help your team understand what it means for them.

A simple way to do that is to think about three questions: What? So what? Now what?

What’s happening? Why does it matter? And what do we need to do about it?

When people are busy or uncertain, they don’t necessarily need more information. They need clarity on what matters and what they need to do next.

 

Be authentic

Authenticity is about allowing people to see the person behind the role. It doesn’t mean oversharing. It might be saying,  “I’m a bit nervous about this presentation too,” sharing a personal anecdote that relates to work, or being honest when you don’t have all the answers.

People want to feel that the person in front of them is genuine. They want to know they’re hearing something real, not a polished version designed to tell them what they want to hear. With the surge in AI speak, authenticity is becoming an even more valuable leadership skill.

When people trust that you’re being genuine, they’re more likely to listen, speak openly and trust you in return.

 

Being a Super Communicator takes practice. It’s about intentionally developing the skills to listen, create clarity, and be authentic.

The key challenge in communication is making sure your message has been understood, not just delivered.

As George Bernard Shaw astutely pointed out, “the single biggest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place.”

Judging by the ecstatic applause at Oliver’s concert, there was no illusion that communication had taken place. Our understanding was real.

 

You can hear Oliver’s music, including the songs he shared with us that night, here

https://gyro.to/442114-WhileTheSunShines

 

Photos of Oliver courtesy of Corinne Haber

Photo of magician courtesy of Amina Filkins 

Photo of headphones courtesy of Paul Seling

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